give me only 38 minutes…and i will be done be calm just as you are and god will bless you quickly, ruth.... being single mother or just single is not an issue (just as pres uhuru told pres obama the issue of gayism in kenya is a non issue) and i want us to talk about single ladies not just single moms..coz there are single ladies without kids too we address the whole issue of being single...in all its dimensions. and its many faces: single ladies, single moms and generally being single
personally, i was born and raised by a single mother btw i have never used the word "father" in the home context i have never used that word... i have spiritual fathers, i have godfathers, fathers in politics, etc...but not a biological father that i know of. fyi, most record holders in the world are of single mothers.. (applause) coz single moms are tough... if you are single and carry yourself with respect, respect you will given.. just like our women rep here hon wanjiru wa chege
single ladies who later get married are well exposed you are almost graduating with a masters degree from havard university. :) but those who get married straight from their parents' house have no experience with real life!! coz she has never paid rent nor made her hair has never bought her own clothes such a lady has no exposure to life if you have managed a salary of kshs 4,000 paid own bills and survived, that's a wise person! after form 4, id propose the kids stay for a year before joining campus
not immediately after form 4 to gain some experience with life to hussle a little with casual jobs dont also get immediately after school learn to stay alone have a few responsibilities of your own be economical with household stuff.. you can't use a whole tissue paper just once!! noooo! a lady who has never paid a single bill can be careless
a lady who has met bills is careful single ladies, with or without children, take pride in your situation now you are being prepared for tomorrow! you will be entrusted with leadership positions including church, ministry or political office or a group, a society, a project, or an ngo.. (applause) so to be single is a non-issue it is not a weakness. you are not a failure destiny is not necessarily to get a husband
jesus was clear that in heaven, there will be no marriage someone had asked christ about the woman with 7 husbands in heaven, there will be no such things.. these bodies we have cannot go to heaven due to their sinful nature so marriage and stuff, those are earthly things as paul said these bodies cannot inherit the kingdom of god due to their lustful nature being married and with a husband is not guarantee for eternal life it is a good thing to have a husband as long as there's mutual love and respect a spouse should be a destiny connector
today let's lay a foundation we shall keep this going on and even make it better in the coming days ok so what makes one single? several things can be responsible: 1. single by choice they don't want anyone close to them emotionally i want my freedom. period
and they are here to learn how to live better with their choices. 2. single by fate due to early and unwanted pregnancy, they find themselves single! and some are funny in this category if not careful, she can get other kids in the same style (laughter) 3. single by death (the husband passes on) 4. single by divorce the marriage can no longer hold: no more love
divorce is an option, and you dont stay in an abusive marriage just to conform (applause) even now, we have people in bad relationships but cant leave just to conform! what will the society think of me? what about the kids? but that's not an issue only death should do you part death has several meaning though what is death? it is one of these things:
1. cease to function 2. cease to produce 3. cease to live all these 3 define death! and they can happen in a marriage too! at such a point, you are free to go! when the love is gone... it is hard to repair the broken pieces and no one can purport to love you when he is being violent and abusive
there are 3 stages of violence in a relationship 1. abuse being insulted and intimidated often. you are ugly, you are not good...etc that's abuse, and the first stage of violence! 2. actual violence it involves physical abuse, intimidation and general embarrassment that is violence 3. honeymoon stage
the final stage of the cycle of violence then the entire cycle repeats itself that is what happens in most relationships and it gets hard for the woman to leave due to these 3 stages now, all these factors can lead to someone being single there are also single moms with several kids and they could be disciplined as she keeps her dating life private but people keep wondering where does she get all these kids from these are the single ladies i want to address tonight!
those who get desperate after finding themselves single moms when you become desperate because of 1 kid from a rlshp that failed another man comes with promises of marriage.. that he will take care of the kid it is in the same process that you end up getting a second one eventually you end having several kids with different men, all in the name of promises others come in the name of house rent quickly, a 3rd child is borne out of that need!
in the struggles of life, yet you find yourself with the 4th child in the name of fake promises even joseph wasn't jesus' biological dad, the man assures you. in the name of school fees, you get the 4th child! the lady gets abused by men coz when she found herself being single, she didnt take time to think, "what next?" just like a football coach who doesn't relax when his team is playing during the 1st half they evaluate their perfomance and look at areas they should improve s.w.o.t analysis and seek to better their game in the 2nd half
so should be done by our single ladies, with or without kids ask yourself, "what next?" before you start being promiscous with different men like matatu saccos, lol rukagina sacco, nazigi sacco, or even citi hoppa haha some single ladies think being single is a ticket to be immoral, nooooo! that all you do is pick your phone and dial different men such that you have created a list of men, each with an own profile
in a single phone, you have like 10 men, each with own description and profile. yes, i know...we are church goers but this am telling you.. some of you, your private parts are on the verge of talking like balaam's donkey! o.m.g. yeah hahahaaa coz of the way you don't let them rest just like the way balaams donkey was beaten till it couldnt take it anymore! so much so that even your pride and sanctity as a woman is no longer there!
your privacy and pride are all gone! thats sad. you can no longer call them private parts! they are now like a public utility. omg (laughter) no longer private they can even be put under the ministry of tourism & hospitality, lol and hospitality industry, haha come on, ladies have respect even for yourself
give yourself a standard being single is not a ticket for you to be immoral! personally, iv been brought up by a single mom with toughness! she raised us all with an iron fist! when you find yourself single, package yourself in a respctable manner in your own situation. let even men know that you are a respectable woman, who doesnt entertain jokers! raise yourself a standard! as you go home tonight, package yourself well, respectably
and that way, you will only attract respectable men in your life keep even your house neat and clean...thats how ladies should be. let when visitors come at your place, know your worth anc character. let it be something positive they get from your way of life and dont allow men to be buying you household items: use your own money! dont be a parasite. buy from your own sweat and hard work but some of us ...someone with a skirt suit... for instance, if she finds herself single, she decides to be wayward...
that every piece of clothes on her, has been bought by different men in her life! that the way she is, more than 10 men have contributed...and they all demand a share of their investment in her! it is such a sad state to be such kind of a single young lady! i want to be meeting young single ladies, proud of their own hard work and achievements! ruth 1:3 3 now elimelek, naomi’s husband, died, and she was left with her two sons. 4 they married moabite women, one named orpah and the other ruth. after they had lived there about ten years, naomi was therefore single due to death of her husband 5 both mahlon and kilion also died, and naomi was left without her two sons and her husband.
naomi was left with 2 widows now, with herself being a widow too. thats is the point as a single mom that you start thinking on your feet married women dont look at things the same way a single lady would co they have a stopping point, beyond which it is the husband who sees and hears things they always got the hubby as the back up for them even when their cars get scratched on the road, the husband will be called to give direction the husband allows a married woman some light duties as he does the major thinking but for a single lady, the case is different: she got no one to consult and she has to think fast and on her feet in every circumstance
and thats how we are here: to stimulate that kind of thinking in single ladies my message to you today is: start thinking and in parenting as a single mom you need to include your brothers your pastor a respectable man in the society to act as a father figure for your kids coz when you are a single mom, you are labeled as an enemy in the society if you dress well, you are a prostitute
if you get rich, it is men giving you money and so many other negative labels just because you are a single lady! all that, just ignore!! just work hard and think like naomi did she knew right then she was single and so are my daughters in law and she remembered about the blessings she had heard about her home country she rose up with her 2 daughters in law
and left moab for her home country since she had heard of the blessings abundant in her home nation her memory opened up after her husband had passed on...before then she didnt care much as her husband used to be her back up plan and now if you realize that your husband is lagging behind dont be afraid to take up the challenge and build your home listen and watch out for opportunities be like abigail who was married by nabal she knew nabali was a fool
and opened her ears and eyes and took charge of her household even with a husband there is a difference between being a man and being male man is a spirit as god said, let's create a man in our own image man is a spirit of god he can give you a lift in his car and not make advances he can take you to hospital at night and nothing weird happens man can give you a jab as a doctor and not get touchy touchy with you
thats a man! a man can assist you pay rent without expecting anything back but a male - if he gives you a lift, expect some advances from him coz thats how males are configured thats the difference between man and male a male mates to reproduce therefore, we are both man and a male in the same person a male as evidenced by the fact i have children and so is anyone out here with a child: he has been in contact with a male
however the driving power of that male is being a man the humane side of a male is being a man just a male is not so helpful like some males you have in your homes "parasitic males" mifugo a younger lazy male putting up at your house that some older women keep at home for sexual favors a lazy male with no sense of direction or responsibility he eats at your place
btw how can you ladies feed a man who just rests at your house? right now he is just chillen in the house waiting for you to bring back food even the samaritan woman had one: the one jesus mentioned about to her go and chase our those leeches! they will suck you dry remain with a man once a lady gets married, she relaxes her senses like in my house, i do most of the work that require most of the strategies and if i was absent, she would do all these on her own and since single ladies dont have a husband, be like naomi
the moment her husband died, she began to see the opportunities and harvests now is the time that you have to look out for the opportunities out there start thinking about the businesses you can do this is not the time for you to become lazy and start looking for male sponsors you will only end up getting more kids and more frustrated in life start looking out for those opportunities like naomi as naomi heard when still in moab that the lord had blessed her country and decided to leave for there focus and don't vent out the anger and frustrations on your kids that aint the right way to bring up those kids
let your kids learn about virtues such as love, humility, perseverance and kindness from you dont bring them up with anger and bitterness and frustration listen, discard all that bitterness and face life with good cheer be like naomi start working hard for both yourself and your kids and naomi said to her both daughters " lets go back to bethlehem now" for there is an abundance of harvest there lets up and leave for judah now but she didnt get bitter about her situation, instead she choose to look at the positive side
she didnt direct her anger to her daughters as some of today's single moms would dont let your older kids be the ones to take care of their younger siblings they are all kids, and need your direct input in their growing all this while you are busy enjoying yourself out there am telling you, that kind of behaviour will only cause you more pain and frustrations make a choice and work hard forget the past and forge ahead declare an end to all the bitterness and raise your kids well show the compassion and love
let not them grow up with fear intead of confidence to go out and face life if your baby daddy wasnt a blessing in your life, then he was a lesson take the lesson and move on to the next chapter ruth, who refused to be left behind by naomi, became a huge blessing to naomi and even to future generations naomi asked herself whats next for ruth?
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